You might expect doctors to be more stressed out than usual this week. According to proposals published by the Department of Proposals we will soon have to be revalidated, recertified and relicensed every five years.

Actually, our reaction has been really laid-back. Mention appraisal and revalidation to your GP and the reply is sure to include the words “usual crapola”. By all accounts, hospital doctors feel the same way.

My previous appraisals have been cosy chats with a neighbourhood GP who possesses the interrogation skills of a rural vicar at a genteel tea-party. “I say, Copperfield, are you still up to date with the management of common medical problems?” “Oh yes.” “You're certain that your overall competence equals or exceeds that which one could reasonably expect from a family doctor?” “Oh, yes.”

This annual pantomime has been relied on to determine my fitness to practise for each of the past three years. I'm due another very soon, but I'm thinking seriously about ignoring the letters inviting me to duck out of an afternoon surgery. Frankly, the game isn't worth the candle.

One of my colleagues has shredded every appraisal letter he has ever received. Eventually his local primary care trust sent him a note, which we can only assume they intended to be interpreted as a threat: “We will not be writing to you about this matter again, Doctor.” And they haven't. He's over the moon.

As part of your GP's upcoming re-vali-licen- certification, your views as patients and carers will be sought. Please exercise your right to reply responsibly. Being asked to forgo antibiotics for a sore throat is not grounds for complaining to the General Medical Council or bad-mouthing your GP in the pub.

Which still leaves you with a problem. If the new-fangled evaluations won't sort out the doctors who can safely practise in their practice from the ones who need to practise before they practise, how will you be able to tell them apart? You could base your judgment on qualifications. Membership or Fellowship of the Royal Colleges is conferred only on doctors thought to be up to the job. But it's a one-off event. Even though I passed my college exam 20 years ago they aren't going to get their certificate back until they prise my cold dead fingers off it.

If you check the doctor's brassplate for clues and the standard basic medical qualification (MB BS or MB BCh) is missing, don't panic. The letters LMSSA might be there instead and indicate a Licentiate in Medicine & Surgery awarded by the Worshipful Society of Apothecaries. It's perfectly above board.

So how can patients tell the difference between good and bad doctors? Bad doctors don't listen, good doctors do; though if they haven't interrupted your flow after a couple of minutes it might be prudent to check for a pulse. Bad doctors don't usually examine their patients; good doctors don't always need to, especially if your description of symptoms is textbook perfect, but they'll always err on the side of having a prod.

Bad doctors haven't been listening, so they can't recount your symptoms back to you in their own words. Good doctors can, even if they lapse into medspeak jargon.

Finally, the bad doctors are the ones with all the free appointments. Good doctors are the ones who inspire confidence so you want to see them again. Just like everybody else does. Which is why it's so hard to get an appointment with them when you need one.

Dr Copperfield is a GP in Essex. He also writes for Pulse magazine and pulsetoday.co.uk

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